My Life As An Upstate New Yorker
You Know You’re From Upstate NY When…
- Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor.
- You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
- You often switch from heat to A/C in the same week.
- You drive 55 mph through 10 feet of snow during raging blizzard with out flinching.
- You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.
- You install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked.
- Bonfires are common events.
- You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
- There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the supermarket.
- Your idea of a huge party is one with lots of cheap beer and people you go/went to high school with.
- You know four seasons: almost winter, winter, cold, construction.
- At least 6 people you see a day have beards and stains on their shirt.
- Cows and corn are just apart of the scenery.
- You can name everyone from your graduating class.
- You or someone you know has a car that sounds like a big truck that can barely make it 20 miles doing 55mph.
- At least 5 times a day you will pass/be passed by a beat up old car that has been attempted at being tricked out with a brand new oversized spoiler, a performance exhaust, or has been lowered.
- Your basement contains deer, bobcat, and/or coyote taxidermy or car collectibles.
- The phrase “Going up to” applies to going north, south, east, or west.
- The smell of freshly spread cow manure doesn’t bother you.
- It’s perfectly normal for your life’s aspirations to be working for the county.
- Halloween costumes are designed around a snow suit and winter boots.
- You know what 4-H is or participated in it.
- You went to a party that was held about 10 miles down a deserted dirt road.
- You schedule parties around the schedules of the cops who wouldn’t bust you.
- You ever went or thought about going cow tipping.
- NYC people that come to live upstate piss you off.
- Guns are a household item.
- You still go home for homecoming.
- At least one person in your neighborhood owns a horse.
- Going out of state for college is a pretty big deal.
- The whole school goes to the same graduation parties.
- You can’t help but to date a friends ex.
- You think kids who ride skateboards are a little weird.
- The town next to you is considered trashy or snotty when it’s just like yours.
- You bragged to your friends because you got stacks or mud tires on your truck.
- Hanging out in parking lots at night time is a likely occurrence.
- You decide to walk for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
- The closest mall is about 45 minutes away.
- Your teachers call you by your older siblings name.
- You have to name six surrounding towns to explain where you’re from.
- The town population increases by 1/3 when the universities go on break.
- You know what “Billy Fucillo HUGE” means.
- You go swimming in lakes, rivers, and creeks.
- You have to drive down back roads to get to work or school.
- You’re related to a police officer that works in your town.
- You see at least 6 people you know/are related to when you’re at the store.
- Going snowmobiling is the only thing that you like about winter.
- Going to Wal*Mart is considered a “good time”
- The conversation of “So you’re from New York?!” “No not the city…” happens when meeting someone out of state.